Amazing! NWSL players sync periods after spending weeks in welfare line together!

Chalk up another win for women’s amazing bodies!  These incredible NWSL ladies were able to sync their periods together upon spending copious time together in the welfare line!

“I wasn’t surprised that happened,” NWSL defender Joy Wiekly says.  “We spend more time getting food stamps, updating our welfare paperwork, and seeing each other at the job center trying to make ends meet than we do actually on the pitch.  I know this happens with women who live together.  Maybe if each of us could afford housing, we might not see so much of each other.”


Living off $7,200 for a year of service to the top tier of American women’s soccer, these women know what it takes to fully combine two of their salaries in order to just barely rise above the federal poverty line.  And that’s just what they’ll have to do in order to even afford simple hygienic needs when Aunt Flow visits them all at the exact same time each month.

You go, girls!

Author: David Martin

Writing for and Propagator of soccer satire. @offensive_loons on Twitter and Reddit.

Leave only correct opinions here

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s