MLS Precaps Week 29

Hard to believe there is just a month left in the MLS regular season. While Tornot FC has to wait at least one more week to be crowned Supporters Shield winners all of the other playoff spots are up for grabs. Atlanta tossed 4 midweek and actually look like legitimate contenders and the Western Conference is an absolute mess. Eight teams could finish anywhere from first to eighth in the standings. Let’s take a look at the matches this weekend!


NYCFC v Houston Dynamo – Bwahaha these idiots share a stadium with the Yankees and the Yankees needed to make up a game so all of the idiots from New York need to drive to Connecticut. Houston is the worst road team of all the teams left in playoff contention and in spite of this game be playing in Hartford, RIP Whalers! they should still get their asses kicked! NYCFC wins 4-1 in David Villa’s return!

New England Revolution v Toronto FC – RIP Jay Hoops. The first match post-Jay Heaps should be an interesting affair for the Revolution. TFC lost mid-week to their Canadian rivals Vancouver and would like to lock up the Supporters Shield while still resting their vets. Will their be a post-Hoops bounce? Methinks not, Toronto FC wins 3-1.

DC United v San Jose Earthquakes – San Jose has played well of late while the rest of the Western Conference really just beats each other up and are now sitting in fifth place. DC is one of two teams with a losing record at home, the other rhymes with Shellay Ralaxy. A cross-country trip to secure points is a tough ask but if the Quakes want to stay in the playoff race they will need to steal at least one in DC. Draw 2-2.

Philadelphia Union v Chicago Fire – The Fire have slowed down and are now fighting for their lives to keep home field for the Knockout Round. The Union have drawn 4 of their last 5 and the Fire seemed to have actually slightly rebounded. Draw 1-1.

Columbus Crew v NY Red Bulls – The Crew only have four matches left and they need to make the most out of them, especially at home and against a fellow playoff contender and potential first round opponent. The Crew haven’t lost in quite some time and the Red Bulls haven’t won. Expect that trend to continue, Crew win 3-1.

MNUFC v FC Dallas – Talk about teams on an absolute tailspin. FC Dallas hasn’t won in two months and have freefallen all the way to eighth place in the Western Conference and are in a very real danger of missing the playoffs a year after winning the Open Cup and Supporters Shield. A road match against a Loons team very much interested in playing spoiler isn’t an easy task. Loons win 2-1.

Real Salt Lake v Seattle Sounders – RSL are 5-2-3 in their last ten, sneakily one of the best teams in the league and they are currently sixth in the West. This is in part to their recent form at home where they have only dropped 2 of their last 12 in the friendly confines of the Rio Tinto. Seattle is currently 4th but only one point off 1st place in the Western Conference. Seattle wins 2-0.

Vancouver Whitecaps v Colorado Rapids – Worst vs First in the last matchup of the day on Saturday has the Crapids coming to Vancouver. This one oughta be a bloodbath. Whitecaps win 3-0.


Sporting KC v LA Galaxy – Sporking KC are the only team left in the MLS that has yet to lose at home as they are 9-0-5 this year. The Sporks are currently third in the West but again only one point off the ‘Caps. The Galaxy can only hope that this year ends mercifully and they are able to steal more points to finsih ahead of the expansion Loons. Not in this game though! Sporks win 3-1.

Atlanta United v Montreal Impact – What a rollercoaster ten days it’s been for the Impact. They lost to the lowly Revolution and MNUFC in back-to-back weeks, including an actual Montreal Meltdown courtesy of Cabrera and Adam Braz. The team Prez literally wrote a letter apologizing for the behavior of the team and calling for the players to not seek the firing of Mauro Biello their manager. Then mid-week, the Impact went to their arch-rival Toronto and dropped 5 on them in a mid-week win that has them back in the playoff hunt only three points off the Red Bulls. Atlanta has looked really freaking dangerous, especially in their new digs where they have scored 17 goals in four matches, only dropping points in one match! Atlanta United wins 4-3.

Portland Timbers v Orlando City SC – Early in the year this had the makings of a matchup that would have playoff implications for both teams. Portland is right in the mix for a home seed and possibly even a bye in the West, but Orlando City SC has faltered after a blistering start to their season. Orlando has gotten the better of Portland in their only two matchups, so they will be thinking about that, but Portland can ill afford to drop any points if they hope to get a bye and especially with Sproting and Vancouver having relatively easy matches. Portland Timbers win 3-1.

And there you have it! Actually some fairly decent matchups this weekend, especially on Sunday which is great because Sunday is absolute crap in Europe this weekend!

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